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Borrowed Time

by Catalysts

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1.
Worth 03:20
I am alive. And tonight I feel more alive Than I have in years. Breathing life into my hopes and dreams, Not being driven by my fears. Because in the past, Oh how they've steered me astray To be controlled by what brings you down Just isn't the right way. Let it all go. That's what I tell myself. And every now and then I believe I have. But it's made it's home inside my head, And it never lets me forget. It doesn't show any signs of leaving, But I'm showing signs of accepting that. I'm fucked up but that's okay, We're all a little fucked up anyway. I've spent so many sleepless nights Questioning my worth. Am I proud of who I've become? Have I earned my place on Earth? What use is a man built of nostalgia And regret? I pushed past those thoughts, I'm not giving in quite yet. Staggered but determined, My ambition will never falter I'll follow my dreams even if it kills me, I'll be alright. I've learned to surround myself, With the ones who push me forward, Not those who hold me back. The ones who make me a better man, Because that's all I want to be. My will will not be broken I will not be broken. I'll push past what holds me back, And carry on. Staggered but determined, My ambition will never falter I'll follow my dreams even if it kills me, My will will not be broken I will not be broken. My will will not be broken I am not broken.
2.
Bruises 04:18
She came home every night Long after last light Covered in bruises Each one with a story of How they came to be A playful memory Buried in her head That kept her up every night That made her wish that she was dead She swore she was fine Told me to pay no mind But I can see that She hasn't slept in weeks She swore she was fine But I know I know She was scared. A love gone south Left a bitter taste in her mouth Taught affection with the back of a hand She was sorry She never wanted to be weak But these days It just feels like routine To hide her marks To play the part of a girl who's okay She's not okay Because she knows that deep down He loves her, but she's wrong. When the bottles come out She knows to shut her mouth Unless she wants to be Everything She promised she'd never become A coward She wants to be strong She wants to handle this On her own Because no one knows No one knows him like she does And the swings and the hits She's getting used to it She swore she was fine She clenched her teeth and she lied But as I looked her in the eyes Something snapped inside She looked back at my and she said She said she was scared A love gone south Left a bitter taste in her mouth Taught affection with the back of a hand She said she was sorry She never wanted to be weak But these days It just feels like routine To hide her marks To play the part of a girl who's okay She's not okay Because she knows that deep down He loves her but she's wrong What kind of a man Shows his strength By preying on the weak What kind of a man Takes pride In making his lover break She said she was scared A love gone south Left a bitter taste in her mouth Taught affection with the back of a hand She said she was sorry She never wanted to be weak But these days It just feels like routine To hide her marks To play the part of a girl who's okay She's not okay Because she knows that deep down He loves her but she's wrong
3.
Dedication 03:30
I'm not giving up. In a world where pretending Is an acceptable substitution for Actually fucking doing Something about a situation I strive to be a shining example Of combining hope with action. I will combine Hope with action. I may never make a difference. I don't expect to be remembered. But I will continue to try Even if I'm doomed to fail. My persistence may be the death of me, But at least I'll die happy. My persistence may lead me to my demise. But I will not die in vein. I told myself I'd never change, But I watched everything Begin to pass me by I won't be left behind Afraid to grow up, Afraid to grow apart, But I will make the best of Every moment I have left in my heart. And I'm tired. But i won't lay this to rest. With my head held high. I will stand against them all. I'm through with living every day As if it were my last, Because my fear of the end, Takes control of my mentality. I'd rather live, As if there was no end to my journey And if I succeed I may just make it a reality All I have to show For my efforts. Does not represent Everything I've done. Because I've accomplished more Than just what can be seen. I told myself I'd never change, But I watched everything Begin to pass me by I won't be left behind. Afraid to grow up, Afraid to grow apart, But I will make the best of Every moment that I have left in my heart. I need to move on. I need to escape the bad, But the good will always come along. My hope has come and gone, But not for long. I'll always find my way Back to where I belong. This is all I have to show For my life. This is all I have left But my dreams aren't out of sight This is all I have to show For embracing the changes And accepting my fate. This is my everything.
4.
I've come to grips with the fact That there are some things in this world That I will never be able to accept And if I let them Control the way I force myself to breathe I'll never remember the taste, the touch, The reason I push myself to succeed All my life I've spent trying to understand where I lost my way I've always walked the same road But me feet are starting to sink My heart is turning cold Through my life I've learned That it's not about letting go It's about getting hold Of what tries to make you fall And finding your balance In a crooked way of living I found new means of breathing I'll take what once tore me down And give it a new meaning I carry my burdens with broken legs Thrown upon my broken back In hopes to one day Fix what was never whole Mend what was never meant To be anything more than A measure of my frailty This town is a graveyard for memories. Of lovers past and could have beens. I walk these streets with a cruel remorse, Wondering if my life has taken it's course And I find myself when I'm lost and alone, When I force myself to leave my home To leave it behind, And be alone with my mind To lay it all on the line And admit that I'm just fine I'm finally learning how to let things go. To live my life above the undertow I've been drowing In what's left of this This emptiness I've learned to call my fucking home Awake but dreaming I'm learning how to live on borrowed time I'm taking my chances I'm taking what's mine This feeling Of emptiness Doesn't own me anymore I'm destined for something greater I'm destined for something more This doesn't own me anymore.
5.
Cope 02:56
I've learned a lot lately About what it means to grieve And what it means to feel Empty How it feels to fall apart How it feels to be a part Of your own downfall These days I'm just trying to cope My insecurities have bound me And tied me down like rope Frayed and forgotten Left sinking in this mess That we call hope And I'm afraid That I too might be forgotten One day if not already My lungs are beggers Left grasping at every petty change Because I know how I've been lately Is no way to live your life So change is all I can hope for To find a new light To guide me home To bring me in out of the storm To keep me from being washed away at sea To find my sinking destiny My love did go south And stayed forever Washed away and flooded Like storm drains in this weather Overflowing At least that's how it feels To have too much too soon Left with no time to heal No time to sleep To get away from myself To get away from my life Cause lately it's just gotten too real I'm just a lost soul waiting for my train Waiting for my turn to get away Is there room for one more On your journey to a different place Called nowhere Cause that seems to be my destination I'm wandering in search of reasons For my fascination with disaster. I read these lines like broken ties To a broken home I've been flirting with heartbreak Like it's the only thing I know I spend my nights wondering Where it all went wrong Why everyone left But if I'm being honest, I can't say i don't know Why I ended up alone
6.
Belonging 05:45
I don't know what's wrong with me I just know I haven't been right lately. I've been caught between a lack of motivation and consistency I clenched my fists until I choked, I gritted my teeth until they broke, I'm left grasping at the pieces of myself That I still have left to show And I can't bear the weight of it all My everything Quickly turned to nothing I found contentment in my resentment But that's not who I want to be anymore I spent these last few years Trying to find a way To stop all of my colours From fading to grey And maybe I'll learn one day To keep my demons at bay I may be sinking But I won't fade away I won't fade into the background I won't be just another let down I'll continue to bury my roots deep Into a shallow town I'll find some common ground And find home in the familiar sound These songs are all I have left, They're all that are keeping me around I don't need a compass To point me to where my heart is The melody will always be What guides me home And I don't need a shining star To point me to where my roots are As long as I've got these songs in my heart I'll never truly be alone Melody Guide me home Take me back To where I belong I spent these last few years Trying to find a way To stop all my colours From fading to grey And maybe I'll learn one day To keep my demons at bay I may be sinking But I won't fade away Stop me From becoming Everything I promised I would never be I've been awake for too long I just can't keep my head strong Please take me back to where I belong I hang in the balance between Who I am and who I want to be And I'm not sure what I believe But one things for sure, I believe in me With the means to overcome I'll take what tears me down I'll take what I'm ashamed of And turn it into something to be proud of I have the means to overcome I have the means to overcome I'll pick myself up before I'm too far gone I have the means to overcome

about

For the kids still fighting with nothing left to lose.

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released March 8, 2014

All songs written/performed by Catalysts
Recorded/Mixed/Mastered by Hunter Bennett

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Catalysts London, Ontario

Catalysts is a 5-piece melodic hardcore band straight out of London, Ontario.

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